It may be difficult to interpret the signals of love. Like love has no age, you may have tender feelings for a person who has lost a spouse. The issue of dating a new person after being widowed is highly controversial. In such situations, everyone around seems to have the right to express their opinion on when is the appropriate time for a widow to start a new relationship. A person whose spouse passed away is afraid to face public criticism and judgment while making a decision on choosing the “right time” for moving further. So, you may even think should you start dating a widow anyway?
That being said, the decision to date another person is not easy. That’s why some widows prefer to remain single and find happiness in their singleness until the end of their days. Some widows don’t mind public opinion and choose to date right away. When someone asks themselves about the best time for a relationship with a widow, there’s no right answer.
Starting Point
For many widows, the idea of starting a new relationship doesn’t make them feel guilty or sad. On the contrary, for many of them, it’s essential to feel they are valued and appreciated. The fact that a window can meet an adult person with whom they may have adult and fun conversations during dinner is nice and appealing to most of them. For many widows, losing a husband equals losing the entire life. So, they need to rebuild it from scratch all alone. The situation gets even more complicated when a widow has little kids with whom she needs to spend days and nights all alone. So, sometimes having a face-to-face conversation with a man sounds really great for a woman who was going crazy all alone at home.
A woman may not be looking for a new relationship for some time. Instead, she may be more interested in meeting new people for a nice conversation. You can make friends with a widow and simply enjoy spending time with her at a pleasant conversation. But if love happens, a new relationship will be more meaningful to her as she has gone wiser, a little bit older, with more obligations and baggage.
Dating a widow – tips to follow
Whenever a man meets a woman who has recently lost her husband, it’s important to get ready for such relationships because they differ from dating other girlfriends. With the following tips and guidelines, men will be prepared for dating a widow.
Asking her questions about the loved ones
One of the best things a man can do to a woman whom he loves is giving her an opportunity to speak about the people she loves. The topics for discussion can be limitless – starting from her pets to friends and relatives.
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When a couple only starts their relationship, they need to get to know each other better. So, talking about the people and things that a woman appreciates is always a wise decision. Such conversations let her relax and get distracted from sad thoughts. Let her talk about her spouse that passed away. In any case, he was a special person to your lady and she should have a lot to tell about him.
Being gentle
Losing a person you love is always traumatic. When dating a widow, you should realize she has been to hell and back after losing her partner. It’s not easy to realize that your love is gone all of a sudden. It’s twice harder to watch your beloved person dying from cancer or another illness.
When a widow starts dating a new partner, it is difficult to let go of the feelings and memories about the person who passed away. There are many other things that can trigger them, including the places they visited and the things they did together. There are other tiny things that can cause an emotional reaction of a widow. In most cases, it has nothing to do with a new partner.
For example, you need to be gentle when your new partner begins to frantically call and text you when you don;t respond in a short time. It’s likely the last time they texted or called their partner was the day he died, so they never got a response. Now, they are afraid a similar situation may happen once again.
You should be ready for this to happen. Such behaviors are often irrational. Mind that’s the time that heals all wounds.
Providing support
The wounds of loss do not heal overnight. The more time passes after a partner’s loss, the easier it will get for a person to live a normal life. From time to time, a wave of grief may come. In such situations, a partner should provide the maximum care and support to a widow. It’s not the best time to pressure her and insist on moving on.
One needs to be ready for such waves of grief to come on holidays, during trips, birthdays, and other memorable events that your partner spends with her ex. Such moments will come and pass. You need to be gentle and supportive during such moments.
Being understanding
The grief that comes with a loss of a beloved person is everlasting. Showing your understanding of what grief feels like can do wonders for your new relationship with a widow. You need to realize that it may take a lot of time for your partner to go over it. However, the truth is that it’s hardly possible to get over the loss. Pressuring on your partner doesn’t prove to be effective.
Being grateful
In a relationship with a widow, you need to be grateful for being with a person who is stronger than you and many other people you know. She has survived in the worst times of her life while standing behind her love that passed away. Now she has the wisdom that comes from surviving the pain and she will do everything possible for this to never happen again.
Be confident
A window may talk a lot about her partner who died. She may have regular waves of grief and even keep his photo in handy. Don’t feel jealous or abused in such moments. On the contrary, you need to be confident that she loves you. You have chosen a person with a wounded heart. So, you should be ready that her ex-love contributed to the person she is today.
Wrapping up
Dating a widow may take your patience and willingness to show your respect to the spouse of your love that passed away. A woman needs some time to heal the wounds of her heart. Some of them are ready to start a new relationship without waiting for months or years to pass. Anyway, when dating a widow one should be ready that a lady will always remember her ex that passed away. You need to be patient, understanding, and grateful. Be confident in your feelings and the tender emotions she has for you. A widow’s reactions to the dating process don’t always follow the same patterns as those of people who are divorced or have never married. Be ready for it. Time will heal the deepest wounds. Make sure to also check the article: 9 tips to make a long distance relationship work.
